Conservapedia:Counterexamples to Evolution/Parody
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Counterexamples to Evolution[edit]
The theory of evolution cannot permit any "counterexamples," or examples of things that could not have evolved.
The following are some counterexamples to evolution. If just one cannot be explained by evolution, then logically the theory of evolution as it is must be inadequate.
- Raindrops on roses
- Whiskers on kittens
- Bright copper kettles
- Warm woolen mittens
- Brown paper packages tied up with strings[1]
- Cream colored ponies
- Crisp apple streudels
- Doorbells
- Sleigh bells
- Schnitzel with noodles
- Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings[1]
- Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
- Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
- Silver white winters that melt into springs[1]
Statistical Approach[edit]
If there is merely a 10% chance that any of the foregoing counterexamples is correct, then the odds of at least one of them being correct is at least 140%.[2] Therefore any chance of the theory of evolution being valid is 40% impossible.[3] As the list grows longer, the theory of evolution becomes increasingly impossible.
Logical Conclusion[edit]
When the dog bites; when the bee stings; when I'm feeling sad, I simply remember my favorite things, and then I don't feel so bad.[4] Thus, if evolution fails to account for any one of these items (or countless others), it must be discarded.